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Fuckin' Steve
Date: 2003-09-12 14:25:39
Comments: Mr. Menke has tried to no avail to contact one Rob Hodge. Countless efforts were made through Scooterworks toll free number, and even one by FAX. As Mr. Hodge has made himself unavailable, Mr. Menke called another paragon of mechanical artistry, Eric Dutra.
Mr. Menke, knowing Mr. Dutra's affinity for Cosas, suggested that a Cosa engine would be the perfect mate for his client's VS5. Mr. Dutra was very enthusiastic about sharing his thoughts, much to Mr. Menke's amusement. He suggested some of your more basic conversions needs, including cutting the frame, and using the carb space as effective storage for gloves, small animals, and Hummel figurines.
Mr. Menke was suitably intrigued by the Cosa idea, so he further suggested cutting a Cosa in half, and grafting the rear end to the VS5's front end. Mr. Dutra was silent (likely having a bong rip), but then quickly gained enthusiasm for the idea, suggesting a modern fork assembly to complement the Cosa's wide wheel. Mr. Menke mentioned his access to a motorcycle frame jig, and mentioned his complete confidence in the conversion.
Having ironed through those issues, Mr. Menke brought up the subject of the Porsche 1600 (two carbs are better than one). Mr. Menke does indeed have a spare Porsche 1600 lying around (lending authenticity to his request). Mr. Dutra was the perect candidate to discuss these matters with, as he has successfully grafted a sofa into a P200. While we were unable to ascertain a way to fit the Porsche motor into the Sprint, knowing that Mr. Dutra has a sidecar, Mr. Menke brought up the idea of having the engine housed transversly in the sidecar, and the transmission acting as the sidecar linkage. Mr. Menke proposed two 45 degree bevel gears, powering a shaft drive to the rear wheel. Mr Dutra, sufficiently dazed and confused, mentioned that he has a CD changer in his sidecar.
After concluding their discussions (Mr. Dutra was no longer able to form cogent sentences), Mr. Menke asked him if Rob Hodge's dad could help, as well as for his number (institution, prisoner, and cell), and promptly hung up.
chelsea
Date: 2003-09-11 09:29:43
Comments: It was a gift of necessity more than anything else...I don't know if you realize how fucking hot it gets here in the summer and the wooly cap just wasn't cutting the mustard.
Keizer Sose
Date: 2003-09-10 20:48:31
Comments: Ms. Chelsea
Because as we both well know, it was your gift of your affection to him. Thus you are an intricate part of the hat. Now keep in mind that Mr. Menke has but one task so far that must be completed by the end of this week, while your task need be completed in about 2 weeks. Thus once Mr. Menke has completed his task, he will receive another one and thus the two of you will be even. How's them apples?
Keizer Sose
chelsea
Date: 2003-09-10 18:49:06
Comments: Mr. Soze, I am glad that my work on the first task appeased you. And of course, if I MUST ride naked, I suppose I will. The one thing I wonder about however is why I have had more tasks than Menke when it is indeed not my hat?
Keizer Sose
Date: 2003-09-10 11:13:34
Comments: Day 10
Mr. Menke, we received word from our people on P-town and are quite happy with your main Rally Girlfriend's tact and work. As such, we are having your hat professionally cleaned by our best Sparticus right now. We are glad you finally got through stage 1 of this.
Here is stage 2.
Menke: You are to call Scooterworks this week. You are to talk to one Rob Hodge. You are to tell him that you have a customer that wants a very special scooter made and that you hear he is the best for custom made scooter designs per say. What your customer wants to do is slam a P-200 engine into a wide body Vs5. You are to make notes on how Rob would handle the conversion. Make sure that he is as descriptive as possible. Once he done, then tell him you have a crazy idea to mount a VW 1600cc engine into a Sprint body and then get descriptive notes from him about how he'd do that. If he isn't helpful, then ask him if maybe if his dad might know and could you contact him and get notes from him. All of these notes will be then be documented and posted to the BBS. We expect this to be completed by the end of this week.
Ms. Chelsea, here is your new task. During the upcoming Checkered Demons 15th Scooter Rally, you are to make one very short nudeish ride. As we are aware of your recent past problems with doing this, we are very willing to make some compromises concerning your concerns as far as keeping this activity from becoming a masturbation fest for online male scooterists. First, you do not have to make this ride in visible sight of the main contingent of scooterist. You may either wear a bra or panties, but not both. Said panties or bra must be dark in color (no frilly whites). you may also wear a full face helmet during said ride. Make sure a scooterist that yo really trust snaps a picture or two or have Scott Baxter watch said ride I trust him to tell me the truth as to if this has really taken place. Should you not have Baxter, just email me the pictures, they will not be posted as we do not wish to make you masturbation fodder for the mass's. We expect word or pictures by 22nd.
Remember, we have the hat and will do what is needed to get our way.
Kaiezer Sose
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